“Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.” ~Eckhart Tolle “I don’t know why I’m so angry,” my mother said.
It was 3 a.m., and my mother was standing outside my door. I had awoken suddenly to hear feet stomping up and down the hallway on one of my last visits to my childhood home before dementia and breast cancer really took hold of her. “Phht, me either.” I tried to empathize, but inside of me rose my own fear and anger, as my siblings and I had watched her decline over the years, yet at the same time, anger was not new to her.
Today, when I think back on this night and so many others like it, the question that I ask now is not “Why are you so angry?” but “Why are you not angrier?” The truth is, I didn’t see a lot of anger in my family growing up, but being a highly sensitive person, I felt it all.
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