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We Need to Talk About Shame From Having Suicidal Thoughts

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themighty.com

Recovery is not linear. I imagine those of you who have ever been in or are currently in recovery know this. In the beginning of my recovery from my undiagnosed eating disorder, I could have my best day followed by my worst day eating and thinking wise.

Same thing with my depression, but it was never as recognizable as refusing to eat or refusing to eat certain amounts. I have always struggled to process my emotions, so it was easier measuring my health through my eating disorder’s behaviors than my depression.

My depression mainly makes me numb for days or weeks, and numbness is not that measurable in my experience. Once I was at my worst state I managed school and graduated with pretty fine grades in the end.

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