“Give me that piece of bread!” this was yelled at me all too much. It created a gif of a piece of bread ripped away from my 9-year-old hands in my head.
I used food as a coping tool. It was my all-time favorite tool in my overflowing treasure chest of destructive eating disorder “coping” skills. “Go ride your bike!” “Go for a walk!” “Go, play tennis!” or “You NEED to move and exercise!” was beaten in me for decades.
When told to do something, I would dig my heels in and state most emphatically NO! I love sports but refused to play them out of pure rebellion. I started to eat to bury my emotions inside of me. I thought I “needed” food to help me deal with the voices and emotions flying in my head.
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