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5 Ways My Marriage Is Better Because of Chronic Illness

Most of us are well aware of the ways in which chronic illness or disability has impeded our lives. The list of things we’ve lost is so very long. That is the reality of this journey. But in the midst of the pain and loss, I have noticed that some things are better because of this. I am a different person as a result of my experience with illness, and so is my family. And in many ways, we are stronger for it. Here are five ways my marriage has improved because of chronic illness:

1. We have grown deeper as a couple.

I thought we knew each other well, and in many ways we did. But after years of sitting at hospital bedsides, navigating new symptoms, riding the rollercoaster of chasing down diagnoses, adapting to limitations and changes, and carrying each other through the pain and loss and fear, we really know each other now. We’ve had difficult conversations about topics we never would have broached. We’ve whispered about our deepest fears in waiting rooms, or lying together in the dark at night. We’ve held each other when it was all too much, and laughed together in spite of it. Chronic illness has taken us far deeper than we’d gone before, and we’ve discovered more and more of each other with each new layer.

2. We have learned how to care for one another.

We’ve navigated a lot together. In addition to the regular stresses of marriage, raising children, and our careers, we’ve had all the ups and downs of my chronic illness journey. And we have had to learn how to help each other through it. We’ve taken turns holding each other as we’ve cried, and we’ve made each other laugh in the midst of the hard times. We have each made space for the other person to rest. He’s picked up the brunt of the work on the home front, and

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marriage: Readers Choice

Most of us are well aware of the ways in which chronic illness or disability has impeded our lives. The list of things we’ve lost is so very long. That is the reality of this journey. But in the midst of the pain and loss, I have noticed that some things are better because of this. I am a different person as a result of my experience with illness, and so is my family. And in many ways, we are stronger for it. Here are five ways my marriage has improved because of chronic illness:
Los Angeles Times interview caught my attention: “I would like to be remembered, No. 1, as a good man. And, by being a good man, I mean as honest as possible.

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