My childhood home was a desperately lonely place. Feeling alone in a family of five causes an exquisite, agonizingly counter-intuitive kind of emotional pain.
I did not feel I was accepted nor belonged. And this set a lifelong pattern of struggling to fit in anywhere, often feeling slightly out-of-place, regularly changing jobs, accommodation and relationships trying to find my place in the world and chasing an ever-elusive comfortable “at home” feeling.
An old, beautiful, proud Victorian stone house elegantly hid a rotten core. Spaced out rooms with high ceilings, the resulting cold interior a fitting metaphor for the emotional disconnect within.
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