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Diagnosis Denial for Experts Part 2: Miracle Seeking

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positivelypositive.com

I suppose I spent a year looking for hope. Except this wasn’t hope, this was an extended form of desperation. I was trying to turn back the clock.It was a frenzy of researching – trawling through page after page on Google, calling up obscure numbers and speaking to weird people that I hoped had the answer, or someone had passed a card to somebody saying they’d helped somebody and they were really good, as long as you paid £100 a month and bought all their supplements!I read everything.

Everything! I became what my doctors called an expert in the disease.At the start, I read without reflection, and not from a reasonable standpoint, but compulsively.

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