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When I Worry I'm Failing as an Autistic Mom During the Pandemic

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I did not sign up for this. I signed up to be a mom, yes. I signed up for dirty diapers, catastrophic messes, potty training, tantrums and sleepless nights.

I did. I signed up for bear hugs, starry eyes, long fascinating “why” chains and unconditional love. Yes. I signed up for all of the financial, emotional, mental, and physical commitments of motherhood — for sure — knowing when I did so that I couldn’t truly know what I was signing up for, because you can never really know what this is like until you’re in it.

But up until now, the mom gig I signed up for — while still the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life — included time spent working or being on my own.

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