Nobody warned me about the guilt. I have experienced grief and loss before, and am aware of its nuances and complexities. But I wasn’t prepared for the debilitating guilt that courses through me on a regular basis as I grieve the loss of my husband.
I am inundated with regret and an impotent yearning to have a “do over” so I can get it right. All I’ve ever wanted was to do right by my husband, and I can’t help but to feel like I failed him in his last moments, and continue to fail him as I learn to navigate life without him.
Five years ago, my husband was diagnosed with hepatocellular carcinoma (liver cancer). There is no cure for liver cancer, so for four years, he underwent various treatments to keep the cancer at bay and extend his life as much as possible.Read more on themighty.com