liking feelings mindfulness

The baby I was holding didn't feel like mine

GP, even though I didn’t want him to. I was absolutely fine, why would I need to see my GP? Before I even got to the appointment, I started having intrusive thoughts and urges to kill my baby, and to stop that from happening I wanted to kill myself.

After a lot of crying, phone calls, and nervous poos I ended up in A&E, at midnight, in the peak of lockdown, with two professionals deciding if I should be admitted to a mother and baby unit or be managed by the crisis team.

The next morning I had a consultant from the crisis team sitting on my sofa telling me I was suffering with postnatal depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder.

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