shame: recent publications

“Why Do I Feel Different? How I Stopped Hiding (and Started Celebrating) My ADHD Differences”

relaxed or at ease in the company of others.In junior high, a group of the most popular girls called each other every night to hash over the school day and gossip. My best friend was in this group, and while I was comfortable talking with her, I felt awkward talking on the phone with anyone else. For example, the first and only time I talked on the phone with “Judy” I knew I was expected to talk to her for one hour or more.

I ran out of topics after a few minutes, but continued having an awkward and strained conversation for the remaining 50 minutes before hanging up, and sadly concluded, “I’m different. I don’t fit in.”In high school, I played on the girls’ softball team. I remember standing on third base yawning and yawning, trying to stay awake.

It seemed strange to me as I wasn’t tired. Who yawns while playing a sport? I do, I reasoned, because I am different. Now I know I yawned from boredom and was struggling to keep myself awake.Even as an adult, my apparent differences were questioned and observed.When my five-year-old son injured his finger and came to me for comfort, I responded by putting a bandage on his finger.

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shame: Readers Choice

relaxed or at ease in the company of others.In junior high, a group of the most popular girls called each other every night to hash over the school day and gossip. My best friend was in this group, and while I was comfortable talking with her, I felt awkward talking on the phone with anyone else. For example, the first and only time I talked on the phone with “Judy” I knew I was expected to talk to her for one hour or more.
How can you be so good at some very difficult things, but so bad at basic tasks like opening mail, paying bills and showing up for appointments on time? It doesn’t make sense.Shame damages our sense of self and can lead us down many dark paths — poor self-esteem, unhealthy coping strategies, strained relationships, and problems in practically all areas of life.When you believe that you’re broken, you focus on your weaknesses, become blind to your strengths, and don’t know what it means to live to your potential. But what if you adopted these strategies to shatter internalized shame? Could you flip the script on your life?An ADHD diagnosis presents challenges.

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