I have always felt left behind when it comes to holidays and social celebrations. There are many different reasons for that, so I’ll only mention the main three. Firstly, the pressure to be “happy” and “positive” and to socialize adequately always left me feeling empty. I lived with undiagnosed complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) from childhood and by my teen years the expectations to mask those symptoms became unbearably exhausting, and frankly unrealistic.
Additionally, growing up in a devout Christian family meant that we observed certain holidays in specific ways, by going to church, gathering as a family, and performing rituals such as communion, group prayers, and the retelling of thematic Bible stories. While benign in
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