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It's OK to Have Complicated Feelings About an Abusive Parent Dying

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I saw an interview the other day with actor Jennette McCurdy where she talked about the complicated feelings she had regarding her mother’s death.

Her mother had been extremely abusive throughout her childhood, so when she died, Jenette struggled to mourn her passing. She even wrote a book entitled “I’m Glad My Mom Died.” While many other people may have been shocked that a child could ever utter such words about their parent, I understood completely because I felt the same way when my own mother died.

I endured a wide range of abuse growing up and my primary abuser was my mother. My memories from when I was a child are like Swiss cheese because my mind has repressed so much, but I’m honestly OK with that because what I do remember is bad enough.

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