borderline personality disorder (BPD) prior to this and had always coped by keeping myself as busy as possible, but something within me had snapped and I was no longer able to hide the impact of my illness.I’d been struggling with self-harm and other self-destructive behaviours for several years and hadn’t been taught how to manage these properly.
Being alone with my thoughts was impossible for me, and the only coping mechanism I knew that didn’t cause active harm to me was exercise.“My mind is a loud and active place, so the zen emptiness that physical activity provided felt euphoric.”Unused to having so much free time, and struggling to manage my ever fluctuating moods, in those first weeks out of work I decided to try to help improve my mental state through exercise and time outdoors.
My first post-hospital run was difficult – I’d become quite depressed over the couple of months before it and had neglected my usually very active hobbies.
Read more on mind.org.uk