people liking suicide

How I Allow Others to See the More Human Side of Mental Illness

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The gym smelled a bit like a warehouse would smell but mostly like sweat. I was not feeling it, but I had decided to show up to Brazilian Jiu Jitsu practice anyway.

Fake it ‘til you make it. I struggled through the warm up wondering why I had come here tonight. My anxiety was making me irritable and my depressive mood was killing my motivation and concentration.

Next came the techniques featured in tonight’s class. I barely paid attention, focusing more on the dull ache at the base of my neck and my negative self-talk telling me I should not have come.

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