Family people life

'Giving In' After Becoming Disabled Is Not the Same as 'Giving Up'

“I’m so proud of you because you never gave up!” “You inspire me because you never gave up!” “You are so strong and brave. And you never gave up!” These are some of the things people have said to me since my illness and subsequent disability.

In the past, I truly appreciated the validation, and loved that my story inspired and empowered others. But upon hearing the words “you never gave up,” a pang of guilt would lance through my heart, and I would think “If they only knew…” If they only knew about the six to eight months of laying in the hospital, confined to bed, staring endlessly at the ceiling, broken, hopeless, weepy, raging, refusing therapy, lashing out at everyone and wanting to die.

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