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Face the Real Fear

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face your fears.Psychologically speaking, it’s pretty good advice:But there’s a nuance here that we often miss:The decision to face or avoid your fears depends on the nature of the fear.The obvious example of this is how we respond to so-called rational fears vs irrational fears:So, the more nuanced—though, decidedly less catchy—phrasing of the old saying might be:Face your irrational fears.But there’s at least one more distinction that affects whether facing or avoiding your fears is a good decision or not…What if you’re deceiving yourself about what you’re afraid of?To illustrate this, let me tell you a brief story about a former client of mine and his spider issues…I had a client once—we’ll call him Tom—who came to see me because of his.

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